| If you feel like you don't know how to talk | | | | harmony - to get closer to someone. If you |
| to people of the opposite sex, you might be | | | | guessed that young boys keep conflicts going |
| onto something!Men and women definitely have | | | | by talking, you are right!4. Girls talk using |
| different ways of communicating. Learning how | | | | words and will use more words to explain |
| the other half uses language will help to | | | | something. A young boy is more likely to use |
| improve your communication with the opposite | | | | actions to emphasize what he is trying to |
| sex.And if you're still not convinced, there | | | | say.As we grow and learn how to talk to |
| is even a term that is specific to the | | | | people, being aware of these differences can |
| different languages of the sexes. The term is | | | | help (especially when the people you are |
| genderlect. Suzette Haden Elgin coined the | | | | talking to are of the opposite sex.)Many of |
| term in her book, Genderspeak. Her book | | | | those early traits continue, as we grow |
| talked about different methods men and women | | | | older. Men will continue to use communication |
| could use to better communicate.Deborah | | | | as a means of staying independent, while |
| Tannen went into even more detail about | | | | women will continue to use language as a tool |
| gender communication in her book, entitled | | | | for intimacy.Grown-up men often will talk to |
| You Just Don't Understand: Men and Women in | | | | establish status (remember the boasting as |
| Conversation (1990, Ballantine.) Tannen says | | | | little boys?) Women will connect themselves |
| that even when a man and woman are raised in | | | | to others by using language to build up |
| the same neighbourhood or even in the same | | | | rapport.Tannen calls these differences |
| home they will grow up in different language | | | | 'report-talk' (men) and 'rapport-talk', for |
| worlds.The question of how to talk to people | | | | the women. Understanding this one specific |
| of the opposite sex really needs to first be | | | | difference can really show how women quite |
| answered by understanding the ways men and | | | | often take what men say, personally, when |
| women differ in how they express | | | | they really were only 'reporting' on a |
| themselves.Here are some of the biggest | | | | situation.Learning how to talk to people is |
| differences, starting at a very young age:1. | | | | made a lot simpler when you understand |
| Girls talk or use language as a way to be | | | | genderlect - the language of the sexes.Peter |
| liked. Little boys often talk to be | | | | Murphy is a peak performance expert. He |
| boastful.2. A little girl will request | | | | recently produced a very popular free report: |
| something. A boy? He makes demands.3. Girls | | | | 10 Simple Steps to Developing Communication |
| tend to use language as a way to create | | | | Confidence. |